Here's your best NFL Week 1 teaser bet

The NFL season officially starts Thursday, which means it's time to get ready to bet. However you choose to place your bets — online sportsbooks, cash bets at your local casino/OTB, or simply a friendly wager with a friend — it's time to prepare yourself for the plethora of bets you can place throughout the season. Oh, you know what I'm talking about. There's so many to name — future bets, prop bets, moneyline bets, spread bets, over/under bets, and of course, a teaser bet.

In case you're not familiar with a teaser bet, click here for a detailed explanation. A standard teaser alters the selected value by six points, which is what we're going to do here. Some sportsbooks will let you alter the value by as much as 10, but we're going to stick with the most common value of six. Football teasers usually only allow you to alter the spread or the total points, and for this teaser, we're going to do the spread for both. 

In order to place a teaser, you must make a minimum of two selections, and most sportsbooks will limit you to a maximum of 10 or 12. For this teaser, we're going to stick with the minimum of two. 

Just like a parlay, the more legs you include, the higher the odds get. However, just like a parlay, if one of your legs loses, your entire bet loses. 

And even though the Buffalo Bills and the Los Angeles Rams kick off the season on Thursday night, we're going to avoid that game all together, and focus on two different games. So, let's get this teaser started! 

Our two picks are the Indianapolis Colts (-7) against the Houston Texans and the Kansas City Chiefs (-5.5) against the Arizona Cardinals. But remember, the teaser drops the Indy spread from (-7) to (-1) and the Kansas City spread from (-5.5) to (+0.5). 

So, if both teams win by at least two points, your bet wins, and if the Colts beat the Texans by only one point, and the Chiefs end up tying against the Cardinals, your bet is a wash. 

Let's talk about why we LOVE the Colts to beat the Texans by at least one point on Sunday. Simple, they're the much better team. Indy realized quarterback Carson Wentz was holding them back last season, so they went out and traded for former league MVP Matt Ryan. 

Ryan might not be the player he once was, but he's still a top-15 quarterback. Put Ryan in the backfield with the best running back in Jonathan Taylor and arguably the best offensive line in the league, and now you have yourself an elite offense. 

The Colts defense was already elite a year ago, and should be the case again this year. Pro Bowl linebacker Shaq Leonard's status being up in the air for Sunday's game doesn't help, but even without him, the Colts defense shouldn't have any issue with the Texans offense. Houston averaged the third-fewest amount of points last year, and not much convinces me they'll be all that much better offensively this season. 

Yes, Lovie Smith is now the head coach, and Davis Mills showed flashes in the preseason and started 11 games as a rookie last year. But that's just not enough to convince me they're going to beat the Colts come Sunday. And remember, we don't need Indianapolis to cover the seven-point spread, we just need them to win by at least two. Considering the Colts beat the Texans 31-3 the first time they met, and 31-0 the second time, asking them to win by two should hardly be as issue. 

As for the second leg of our teaser, we're taking Kansas City to win by at least one. If DeAndre Hopkins wasn't suspended for the first six games of the season, we probably wouldn't be using this game for our teaser, but he is. When Hopkins is healthy, he's simply one of the best receivers in the game. Without him last year, Arizona went 3-4. And make no mistake about it, they looked lost at times without him. 

Even though Arizona acquired wideout Marquise Brown from Baltimore in the offseason, Brown is simply no Hopkins. Same goes for AJ Green and Rondale Moore. And it's not like Kyler Murray exactly had a great season last year. The Cardinals went 1-4 in their final five games last season, and I'm not convinced that solved all their problems this offseason.

And it's not like they're playing just an OK team. They're playing the Kansas City Chiefs. Three years ago the Chiefs won the Super Bowl, two years ago they lost in the Super Bowl, and last year they lost in the AFC Championship Game. Even without Tyreek Hill anymore, KC still has an elite offense, and more importantly, an elite team.

Once again, you just need the Chiefs to win. That's not asking too much against a Cardinals team that fell apart down the stretch last year, and is without their best receiver for the first six games. This game could be close for a little bit, but expect Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs to pull away late.

The Teaser Bet: IND from (-7) to (-1) & KC (-5.5) to (+0.5) (-121 odds via Barstool)

Bet $121 to win $100

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Jared Shlensky joined Yardbarker in June of 2022 and writes about MLB, College Football and the NFL. Jared enjoys keeping up with pro and college football contests based out of Las Vegas, and he is a big fan of parlays, round robins, future bets, prop bets, and most of all, teaser bets. Jared is also a certified Pharmacy Technician and play-by-play broadcaster. Follow Jared on Twitter @JaredShlensky.